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Cost considerations when choosing direct cremation.

Posted by Mike 
· September 29, 2020 

This article will discuss the costs involved in choosing a direct cremation.  There are two basic ways to arrange for direct cremation: through a funeral home or directly through a crematory.  A crematory is a business that only performs cremation services.

Generally speaking, most funeral homes do not perform cremations themselves.  Instead, they contract out their cremation services to a crematory and include the crematory’s fees as part of the funeral home’s bill.  Many times the funeral home will add a separate handling fee to the crematory’s charges.

This means it’s usually less expensive to arrange direct cremation through the crematory.  Doing so allows you to eliminate any extra fees from the funeral home.

Average Direct Cremation Costs

The average cost of performing a direct cremation through a funeral home is between $1,600 and $3,000.  Costs can run as high as $5,500 if you purchase a casket to be used in the cremation.

The average cost of performing a direct cremation through a crematory is between $1,000 and $2,200.  Again, costs can be significantly more if you cremate the body in an expensive casket.

From a practical standpoint, there isn’t a good reason to purchase a casket for use in a direct cremation.  You’ll be fine using a less-expensive cardboard box, sometimes referred to as an “alternative container.”

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

Categories : Funeral Planning Guidance
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Traditional funeral services: the advantages and disadvantages.

Posted by Mike 
· September 26, 2020 

This article identifies a variety of considerations related to holding a traditional funeral service.  Reviewing these considerations will help you identify the type of funeral service that is most appropriate in your situation.

Advantages of a traditional funeral service

A traditional funeral service is the most popular –and therefore, socially acceptable- type of funeral service in America.  The structured formality of the traditional funeral service may provide the family with a sense of comfort and closure not experienced in less formal service arrangements.

The traditional funeral affords ample time for friends and extended family to attend and support the surviving family members.  A traditional funeral usually includes some type of viewing ceremony held one or two nights before the actual funeral.  Since the funeral ceremony itself is almost always held during the daytime, this nighttime visitation allows friends to pay their respects, even if they work during the day.  Also, by scheduling the traditional funeral three to six days after the death, extended family members have time to make travel arrangements, if necessary.

The traditional funeral provides many ways to celebrate the life of the deceased.  Although the traditional funeral can be a fairly structured event, it also provides maximum flexibility in terms of casket choice, religious readings, flower arrangements, and eulogies.

Lastly, the expenses associated with a traditional funeral service leave plenty of room for negotiating a big discount.  Using a resource like the Funeral Saver’s Kit to plan your funeral can often slash several thousands dollars from the funeral home’s bill.

Disadvantages of the traditional funeral service

The main disadvantage of the traditional funeral service is its cost.  The traditional funeral service is the most expensive option in terms of service, disposition, and memorial costs.  The average traditional funeral costs nearly $7,500 and often exceeds $10,000.

Many people also feel that traditional funeral services lack meaning.  This is often the case when the family fails to personalize a highly-structured traditional funeral service.  (The Funeral Savers Kit provides many useful tips that show you how to personalize the traditional funeral service for free.)

Holding a viewing during the evening, followed by the actual funeral service the next day, forces family and friends to make multiple trips to the funeral home (separate trips for viewing and funeral ceremonies).  This may be an inconvenience for family members that are ill, disabled, or have to travel great distances.  The traditional funeral also requires the greatest time commitment from the immediate family in terms of planning and attending ceremonies.

Unfortunately, the traditional funeral service is subject to the greatest amount of sales pressure from funeral home employees.  Because there are many funeral goods and services associated with a traditional funeral, there are a lot of opportunities for the funeral home to sell overpriced (and often unnecessary) items under the guise of “tradition.”

The traditional funeral service, like any other type of funeral service, has both advantages and disadvantages.  Considering both the benefits and costs associated with a traditional service allows you to make an appropriate choice for your family.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

 

 

Categories : Funeral Planning Guidance
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How to write a eulogy

Posted by Mike 
· September 23, 2020 

Eulogy is pronounced like this:  /Yule-ah-gee/

A eulogy is simply a speech about a loved one who has died.

This speech is usually given during a memorial or funeral ceremony.  While it is often given by a close friend or relative of the deceased, it can also be given by a religious leader.

Don’t stress out over giving a eulogy.

Think of it as a simple conversation with the family and friends about the life of the person who has died.  Remember, the funeral or memorial ceremony is usually only attended by people that somehow mattered to the deceased.  They are eager to hear about the deceased and will appreciate anything you say.

Almost EVERYONE is afraid of speaking in public

The “audience” is NOT expecting you to give a flawless speech.  If fact, if you “mess up” a little (or a lot), the audience tends to rally around you even more.  They really do!

There is no “right way” to compose a eulogy.

Since most people have no idea what a eulogy is supposed to sound like, you can pretty much create it any way you want.  Here are some things you may want to talk about:

  • a brief “life history” of the person who has died
  • important achievements and events in the deceased’s life
  • details about family, friends, work, and hobbies
  • favorite memories of the deceased

Most eulogies last between 5 and 15 minutes but there are no hard and fast rules here.  You can also deliver “vignette” eulogies.  This is where several different people take turns speaking about the deceased.  For example, each of the children of a deceased parent could give a small speech about their favorite respective memory with the deceased.

Breaking a single eulogy into separate vignettes gives others a chance to participate in the services and takes the pressure off of just one speaker.  Even if each person speaks for just a little while, it will seem like a longer, more robust speech because it takes time for each person to walk up to the podium and then return to their seat.

Basic steps for writing a eulogy:

  1. Write a brief chronological outline of the key events that occurred in the person’s life from the time of birth until death.  This will often remind you of several pivotal events experienced by the person (e.g. graduating from college, getting married, serving in the military, starting a business, etc.) that may be worth mentioning.
  2. Write down your favorite memories of the deceased.  Ask others (friends, relatives, co-workers) if they have favorite memories you can share.  Often times people have things they want to say during the funeral but they are either afraid to speak or aren’t afforded an opportunity.
  3. Make a list of some of the things that were important to the deceased person….things he/she was passionate about.  This may trigger stories of their own that you can incorporate into your speech.
  4. Combine all your thoughts, ideas, comments, and memories into one giant list.  Review this list and decide which things you want to include in your speech.
  5. Organize your chosen comments into some type of order.  For example you might want to organize by:
  • Chronological date the events occurred
  • Common themes (e.g. family, career, work, hobbies)
  • Speaker (if you plan on using vignette eulogies); develop a schedule that shows when each person is to speak.

More eulogy tips

Write out your speech.  You may feel more comfortable writing out the entire speech or you may just decide to use note cards with a few sentences that will trigger your memory so you remember what it is you want to say.  Again, there is no one right way.  Some people will commit the speech to memory and never need to refer to their notes; others will look at their speech and read it word-for-word without ever looking at the audience.  Use whatever method is most natural for you.

Your speech can be serious, light-hearted, or a combination of both.  A mix of both seriousness and humor is most popular.  Funerals are a combination of sadness and celebration.  People will grieve at funerals, but it’s OK to laugh too.  It really is!

Also, since no one but you will ever see what you have written you don’t need to worry about grammar or spelling.  All you need is to have something in writing that will remind you of what it is you want to say.

Practice saying your speech out loud while in front of a mirror.  This will help you develop a natural speaking rhythm and will highlight any verbal or physical habits that could be a distraction to your audience.

Remember to take a clean copy of your speech with you to the funeral home.  You can either write it out word-for-word or just make a few necessary note cards to trigger your memory. (Make sure you number the note cards so you can keep them in order.)

 Delivering the eulogy:

Focus on honoring the deceased instead of worrying about how your speech will sound to others.

  • Take deep breathes before beginning your speech. This will help you regain composure and slow your heart rate down.  This will also help you speak in a slower, more controlled manner.
  • Take a drink of water before speaking (or take something to drink with you to the podium) to keep your mouth from getting dry.
  • Remember: that it’s OK to show emotion. If you become emotional and start to cry, that’s perfectly normal (even if you are a guy!). No one will think any less of you.  Take time to regain your composure, but if you’re unable, simply say “I am sorry, but I can’t go on right now” and return to your seat.  The funeral director or clergy member will step in and continue the ceremony from where you let off.

One final thought:  It’s an honor to be asked to give a eulogy.  You wouldn’t have been picked if you weren’t special to the deceased in some way.  Others know this and they will EXPECT you to be grieving too.

 

Categories : Funeral Planning Guidance
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What’s the difference between a funeral service and a memorial service?

Posted by Mike 
· September 20, 2020 

Funeral homes provide different services depending on the needs and preferences of the decedent’s family.  While many people use the phrases “funeral service” and “memorial service” interchangeably, they are actually different services.

A “funeral service” is any official ceremony that takes place in the presence of a casketed body.  In other words, the body (inside a casket) is present during the ceremony.  The casket lid may be open or closed.

A “memorial service”, on the other hand, is any official ceremony that takes place without the casketed body being present.  For example, the ceremony might take place with just an urn containing cremated remains (i.e. “ashes”) serving as the focal point of the ceremony.  Alternatively, the focal point could be just a picture of the deceased displayed on an easel.

Other than this distinction, both a funeral service and a memorial service are similar.  Both types of services last approximately 25 minutes and are usually accompanied by a eulogy delivered by a family member or clergy member.

Usually, a funeral home will charge the same amount for a memorial ceremony as they charge for a funeral ceremony (around $500).  Remember, the ceremony itself is just one component of overall funeral costs.  A typical funeral or memorial service can easily run more than $7,000.

There are many things you may want to consider when deciding between a funeral, memorial, or cremation service.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

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Understanding funeral home services.

Posted by Mike 
· September 17, 2020 

Many people want to know what services are offered by a funeral home.  Funeral homes, cemeteries, and memorial dealers all play an important role in caring for a deceased family member.  However, funeral homes normally handle the actual funeral or memorial service.

Different funeral home services

But not all funeral services are like.  In fact, funeral homes offer a range of services designed to accommodate different wishes and budgets.

Here are the most common types of services offered at most funeral homes:

  •  traditional funeral service
  • immediate burial
  • direct cremation
  • cremation with services
  • donation
  • memorial service
  • graveside service
  • private service

You should not finalize any funeral arrangements before you understand the goods, services, and costs associated with each option.  During the arrangement conference  you should ask the funeral director to explain his services and prices in easy-to-understand language so you can make the right decision for your family.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

 

Categories : Funeral and Cremation FAQ's, Funeral Planning Guidance
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What are the advantages and disadvantages of direct cremation?

Posted by Mike 
· September 14, 2020 

Direct Cremation Advantages

Direct cremation offers an affordable alternative to traditional body burial.

While direct cremation can significantly reduce funeral home costs, you can reap additional financial benefits from the cemetery and headstone dealer.  If you choose not to bury the cremated remains – and many people do not – you can eliminate many items that make the traditional funeral so expensive.

Here is a list of costs you can eliminate by choosing direct cremation:
  • expensive casket
  • embalming
  • funeral home staff and facilities charge
  • cosmetic and hair dressing charges
  • funeral chapel or church fees
  • viewing or visitation charges
  • transportation fees (hearse, flower car, utility vehicle, etc.)
  • burial plot or mausoleum crypt
  • vault or grave liner
  • grave opening and closing costs
  • headstone or grave marker

But price is not the only advantage in choosing direct cremation.  Many people prefer cremation because the cremains (i.e. ashes) are portable.  This allows families to take remains with them when they move.  Many people also feel that choosing cremation over body burial is friendlier to the environment because no land is disturbed.

Direct cremation is also simpler and more expedient.  The entire affair usually takes place in just two or three days; furthermore, direct cremation requires less time commitment from the family.  This can be especially important if surviving family members are ill, disabled, or live far away.

Cremation also offers a wide range of disposition options.  While most families decide to keep remains at home, other options exist.

Direct Cremation Disadvantages

While direct cremation offers many advantages, you also need to consider its potential disadvantages before finalizing your plans.

Because many families find comfort in holding a traditional funeral service, a simpler direct cremation may not be therapeutic enough to satisfy surviving family members.

In addition, direct cremation does not allow the family to celebrate the decedent’s life, nor does it give friends an opportunity to say goodbye.

And because the funeral home makes less money when providing direct cremation services, funeral home employees may try harder to sell you extras.

Lastly, even though you may not have to buy a grave site or headstone, you will incur an additional expense if you decide to purchase an urn.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

Categories : Funeral Planning Guidance
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Understanding your total funeral bill.

Posted by Mike 
· September 11, 2020 

Funeral expenses really consist of three separate pieces:

  • the services and merchandise provided by the funeral home
  • the costs and services to dispose of the body or cremains (i.e. ashes) at the cemetery or elsewhere
  • the cost to purchase and install some type of memorial (i.e. headstone, marker, monument)

Even if you end up paying for all three pieces through the funeral home, it’s best to break the cost of a funeral down into the above-three categories.

When estimating your TOTAL funeral costs, you must add all three pieces together. I think this is by far the best way to plan a funeral because it allows you to isolate and prioritize the goods and services that are most important to you.

While every family is different, the most common complaint I hear from families is “I wish I would have spent less on the funeral and more on the memorial”. This makes some sense since the memorial is the only thing that lasts after the funeral is over.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

 

Categories : Funeral and Cremation FAQ's, Funeral Planning Guidance
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What to do when you can’t afford to bury someone

Posted by Mike 
· September 8, 2020 

As the economy has slowed, more families have been forced, for financial reasons, to choose cremation instead of body burial when someone they care about dies.  A typical traditional funeral followed by body burial in a cemetery costs between $7,000 and $10,000. A typical funeral service that results in the body being cremated runs approximately $3000. While the trend towards cremation will likely continue in the near future, there are things you can do to make body burial more affordable.

One of the simplest things a family can do is choose a service level known as an “immediate burial”.  With an immediate burial the body is taken directly from the place of death (or morgue) to the cemetery. Normally, the body stops at the funeral home just long enough to secure the death certificate and burial permit (and for the family to buy a cemetery plot if they don’t already own one). No funeral ceremony is held at the funeral home.

The family can still choose to hold a memorial service elsewhere (e.g. at their church – often for free).  This would reduce funeral expenses enough to allow the family to bury the deceased in a cemetery for about what it would cost to hold a typical cremation service at a funeral home.

Forgoing services at the funeral home will usually allow you to reduce or eliminate these costs:

  • Funeral ceremony
  • Viewing or visitation ceremony
  • A nicer, more elaborate casket
  • Embalming
  • Other body preparation (e.g. makeup and hairdressing)

By choosing an immediate burial followed by a memorial service at your church you can realistically reduce the funeral home’s bill from about $7,500 to about $3,000.   There are actually quite a few things you can do to reduce the costs associated with both body burial and cremation. It pays to learn a little bit about the prices and options available in your area.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

Categories : Tips to Lower Funeral Costs

What costs are associated with a traditional funeral service?

Posted by Mike 
· September 5, 2020 

This post provides price ranges for many of the items associated with a traditional funeral service.  Reviewing these considerations will help you identify the type of funeral service most appropriate for your budget.

A traditional funeral service can cost nearly $10,000

While the average funeral costs nearly $7,500, many traditional funerals cost in excess of $10,000.  Here are the main components typically associated with a traditional funeral:

  • casket: $2,300
  • funeral director’s basic services fee: $1,400
  • embalming and body preparation: $600
  • viewing / visitation ceremony: $400
  • funeral ceremony: $450
  • transportation (pick up body, limousine, and hearse): $625
  • miscellaneous (certificates, permits, music, clergy, obituary, register book, service folders, obituary, flowers): $500
  • grave site $1,000
  • fee to dig grave site $500
  • headstone $1,500

The above costs represent national averages for many of the costs associated with a traditional funeral service.  Your actual costs could be higher (or lower) based upon geographic location, the funeral home you select, and the actual items you purchase.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

Categories : Funeral Planning Guidance
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Consider more affordable funeral suppliers.

Posted by Mike 
· September 2, 2020 

Sometimes it makes more sense to buy certain funeral items from someone other than the funeral home handling your service.  These other suppliers usually offer more reasonable prices than the typical funeral home.

Make an effort to locate other sources that sell funeral merchandise

See what they charge for the items you’re thinking about buying.  Even if you don’t buy from someone else, just knowing that less-expensive options exist can often get your funeral home to give you a big discount to remain competitive.

Savvy families do this all the time

They end up saving hundreds – and sometimes thousands – of dollars on caskets, urns, and headstones.

I give my clients a simple chart that shows them where to find various merchants that may be worth considering.  I also give them a handy “grade sheet” that compares each of the popular Internet suppliers of funeral merchandise.  This grade sheet makes it easy to locate lower-priced merchants and determine how the competition stacks up in terms of prices, selection, and quality.

When you use this information you’ll be able to make sure you get a GREAT deal on everything you are forced to buy.

If you would like to save money the next time you need to make funeral arrangements, you can search and compare local funeral home pricing at Parting.com.

 

 

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